Posts Tagged wife
It’s come to my attention that I’m clairvoyant
Posted by crusaderjennblog in Faith, family on July 16, 2015
And it’s not anything that I ever wanted, but I guess since it’s not in any way a career path, we’re all good. Since my left brain-ness typically only considers the literal about most things, it takes me a while to ‘get’ anything outside the box, because I’m legalistic that way. In summary of this situation, one might say, I failed to add two and two, where the most basic of addition would have lead me to recognize a simple correlation between nearby regional earthquakes and a challenging vertigo episode that often begins within a few hours to 48 hours before a quake. Perhaps it all depends on how slow or fast the tectonic plates shift or how massive the seismic activity in my geographic region? Is there a seismic expert in the house?
I only recognized this during the recent few months that with each earthquake that has occurred within my region in the last 20 years, I’ve experienced severe vertigo. By ‘severe’, I mean vertigo that has me seeing doubles/triples and everything around me spinning at an exponential speed. How’s that for fun? On the bright side, this ‘fun’ occurs without warning and gives me a sensation that I am taking full advantage of an unlimited pass to ride all the twisting and turning roller-coasters on this planet – all in a few minutes. Yay for me! Now the reality is that one of these unwelcome vertigo episodes begins with spinning and often gets worse through the first day only to climax until the earthquake occurs. Then as a final reminder to not forget that this unwelcome guest stopped-by and overstayed its welcome, it provides a sickness ‘hangover’ for at least a day after the event. When you’ve been sick with a cold or flu for example and have taken those fantastic symptom hiding over-the-counter treatments like the, “Sniffling, sneezing, head-aching, so you can rest magic,” and wake the next morning feeling a little more clear-headed, but wondering where and what barricade you hit going 55 miles per hour, that’s the medicine hangover I’m talking about, as I wouldn’t know anything about other types.
When the most recent episode occurred June 23, I posted to the social network: I said something to the effect that, “History states whenever I experience a severe case of vertigo, an earthquake occurs in my geographic region within 48 hours, but I hope for once I will be a false prophet.” So, 48 hours came and went and nothing happened. Except it did. But I’m not on the network enough to see comments or even watch the local news because I might at times resemble living under a rock when said vertigo occurs. Watching TV and reading the paper is impossible when I see doubles and triples of everything. So, a friend saw my post and watched our regional news closely and notified me that a quake occurred on our fault line. In Alaska. Another quake occurred May 22 – same situation in me having vertigo a couple days ahead. We also had a quake earlier in the year and like clock-work, vertigo set in a couple days in advance. So wherever we’ve lived, vertigo is indicative of an earthquake within 48 hours. I believe there’s a correlation between how much of he human body is water (60-75%) depending on which expert and just like the changing tides and the closer a full moon gets to earth, there is something that sets off my balance and the liquid in my inner-ear that goes wonky with seismic activity.
You probably agree that my husband had an interesting perspective about this. B’s interpretation was that upon me discovering my ‘ability” to foresee earthquakes, I should also consider that God’s using this ability to communicate with me. Wow! That interpretation was unexpected. Decades ago at the private school, my classmate’s nickname for me, was ‘Doubting Thomas,’ which could not be more accurate than it is now. And the reason it’s relevant is because for over a year, I’ve received these ‘snapshots’ that just appear in my head. These uninspired and by uninspired, I haven’t seen a tear-jerker commercial, for example, but these snapshots have been of me or B or both of us with one or two children, but since we don’t have children, I got into the habit of quickly disregarding these ‘snapshots.’ (I’ll share with you later about B’s reaction a few months ago to my confession about the snapshots). And that’s why B’s interpretation is that just like I foresee earthquakes, God’s trying to show me that these snapshots are going to be reality. What? Whoa, Dude! No way! Is this even a reasonable possibility? Yes. Matthew 19:26. And Mark 9:24 has also become a daily reference. Dear Lord, I want to believe and I think I believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!
Are you clairvoyant or have you experienced anything like this or have you been a witness to someone experiencing this?
Share this:
Funny Friday
Posted by crusaderjennblog in family, Funny Friday on February 6, 2015
We’re already at the first Friday of February 2015! I love a good parody vid and this “All About That Cake(and Chicken)” vid is pretty cute (tune based on Meghan Trainor’s “All About That Bass.”
The magnified size of a spider (in my head) might explain why I have this irrational fear of those eight-legged monsters…
What a great idea!!!
Lie detector test – but kids never lie!
Enjoy and have a fabulous weekend!
~Jenn
Share this:
Let’s talk about intentions
Posted by crusaderjennblog in Faith, marriage on February 5, 2015
Merriam Webster’s website (2015) defines intention as a noun and “something you aim to do” or a “purpose.” I believe that most people hope and aim to do their best and make intentions / commitments accordingly, therefore one might say that, “They had the best INTENTIONS.” I occasionally hear and read emails from or about people admitting to an event or something they intended to do, but obviously failed since the word was in the past-tense. Failed intentions are quickly given a pass because that wasn’t their, let’s say it together, INTENTION. The word is over-used and loosely-used to excuse an over-commitment (lie) / bad behavior or a failure. Now I’m confident that there are a great many who will call me judgmental and say I lack tolerance of people’s situations and go on to say that I must be perfect, blah, blah blah… I am far from perfection, but as a Christian, I try to do better than the day before and never over-commit. I was once one of those obtuse folks who over-committed and later canceled last-minute because I had the best of intentions to participate in making some donated goodies, for example, or however I committed only to later realize I committed to an activity in which I aimed to participate, that I really never had any intention of being involved. Okay, now get over yourself because you wouldn’t be that defensive if you weren’t also guilty of this.
At one time, I intended / committed to make cookies every Sunday for our old church. It was a small church and I needed to make only seven dozen cookies, which I often made every Saturday-night for the next morning. Considering how much I love baking, it was a very small act of service, but there came a point a few months later after doing this every weekend when I became bored and would cancel because I just didn’t feel like baking. Granted I had health issues that were becoming a contributing factor in this, but I should have resigned from my commitment ahead of time instead of being proud and stubborn. I spoke with someone about this and Mickey pointed out to me that intentions can go either way – we either do what we committed to do or we intend to not follow-through. When he further explained that it’s either/or or pass/fail, my eyes were opened more widely because I think like many, we think our intentions outweigh outcomes. But they do not.
About intentions in marriage…
Commitments / intentions should be as solid as your marriage vows and upheld. You make a commitment to your spouse and you should do whatever you have to to make sure you do not fail. Obviously, emergencies happen and must be accommodated, but a commitment remains a commitment. Over recent months this has become somewhat of a thing in my marriage. We’re working on 19 years together, but it’s been fairly consistent during only the last couple of years that B’s intentions to do something for me have some sort of ‘optional’ clause to not follow-through, perhaps? It is a bit hurtful, I admit, but because he intended to follow-through, I think he thinks that he should receive points for the intention, I guess? Now these broken commitments are small in the grand scheme and are not by any means divorce-worthy. However, it remains hurtful that I might have become somewhat of a sacrifice, as he makes sure he follows-through with each commitment beyond us. Perhaps he doesn’t want to appear a flake among coworkers or peers?
It’s interesting that people have such varying perspectives on intentions with spouses. For one individual, an intention to a spouse is as good as a signed contract and they will move mountains to ensure the intention/commitment remains unbroken, but for another, who sees their spouse as ‘just my husband’ or ‘just my wife,’ they have given themselves the option to fail [Stop taking your spouse for granted!], when it should be the complete opposite as they should elevate their spouse’s importance instead of diminishing it. Commitments to a spouse to fix an appliance or prepare a platter of goodies for coworkers or whatever the task is should be more important than commitments to non-spouses since you’re married to one and only work with or for another. I’ve never understood those who say things like that because essentially, they have lessened their spouses role and therefore their spouse’s value. Many years ago, I attended a work-related event with my husband and when his boss walked-up and asked who I was, I smiled and said, “I’m just B’s wife, Jennifer.” B’s boss responded with, “Hmm, you mean you ARE his wife and not just his wife…” That might have been eye-opening for me because there I was speaking condescendingly about myself.
Now, I must explain that my husband is NOT a monster. I think at times his focus gets wrapped-up in whatever project has his attention and that he doesn’t see the looming ‘something’s got to give’ warning sign up ahead. Unfortunately, that something is most often me because typically I am an understanding wife I attempt to be an understanding wife. I suspect there might be a few others in a similar situation and am curious how you address a concern with your spouse or do you prefer to avoid it? What is your best approach? What is your coping-mechanism? I like wine, which may or may not be relevant in this situation, but I believe that I just stumbled upon another blog-post idea…
~Jenn
Share this:
Is the potential to make things worse, worth the risk?
Posted by crusaderjennblog in Faith, family, Jesus, MS on January 17, 2015
I’ve been in the middle of using those critical thinking skills and I think because of my tendency to analyze and reanalyze in all numbers of equations, those skills only become more and sharper to more quickly come to reasonable conclusions. I’ve been very blessed these last 10 years. Rereading that number is incredible because I had to use a wheelchair from ’01 to ’05. 10 years ago I was able to quit using a wheelchair. Wow! I’ve tried to never take for granted what I have because this disease could easily and without notice, remove a number of abilities as it did in years past. The abilities to walk, run, see, swallow and void without the proper tool for example are some things that I could not do for a number of years, so when I could do them again, I’ve tried to always remain grateful and Praise God that those abilities were returned to me and that I still have them 10 years later. The high temperatures of last summer challenged my MS. Obviously we’re months beyond last summer, but I wonder if it’s possible that the high temperatures continue to have a lingering effect on my current state.
I saw my neurologist yesterday and while I was in the waiting room I played an iPad game. Being left-brained, I’m always playing games during which I mentally analyze a number of things that do not have anything to do with the game because I can play the game on ‘automatic pilot’ therefore allowing myself to think on other issues like determining if I’ve created a symptom or whether it was already a symptom. As I was matching tiles, I noticed a feeling in my leg that I hadn’t experienced in years. Numbness and tingling. Then I disregarded what that feeling meant and continued playing. The nurse lead me to a room and I noticed the feeling again. A bit later on my way home from my neurologist’s, I was unsettled about the whole numbness episode because although I was conveniently at his office for an appointment, it seemed he was too quick to prescribe a new bout of treatment. I signed the okay to move forward because I just wanted to get home. I didn’t bother to turn on the radio while driving because I needed to pray and concentrate on what a new treatment might mean. At home I immersed myself into tasks that needed to be done before the weekend began and finally, the dam broke and my eyes sweat (I cried). When I once again acknowledged the unpredictability and reality of my disease, I researched the suggested drug and failed to see any endearing qualities so instead of filling the prescription, I’ll keep doing what I’m doing with exercise and diet.
10 years ago when I got better, I desperately needed a reboot and I quit taking the 13 symptom-chasing drugs that my prior neurologist in Washington kept prescribing for me because I needed to know if those were still necessary. When I quit taking all those drugs, I almost immediately noticed that I felt better. Feeling lucid and NOT feeling like a zombie or I guess what I assume a zombie may feel like, definitely feels better. The list of 14 side-effects of this potential new prescription from my current neurologist included 7 issues that MS currently gives me and upon further reading, those issues would likely be exacerbated with the new prescription! “hmm Let me think about this… gosh, everything sounds very enticing and like something with which I think I should definitely take some risks,” said no reasonable CrusaderJenn EVER. As I’ve already been down the road of drug cocktails and symptom-chasing, I’m content to wait this round out. I understand those who see my decision as foolish. However, please take a moment to understand that I was diagnosed 20 years ago and from MS years 7 through 12, my MS symptoms covered many of those who have a more progressive form of MS. I doubted my own longevity back then and I recently found out that my family also doubted that I’d make it to 30-years-old because my relapsing-remitting MS progressed so badly and so quickly. But God did heal me and here I am 10 years later.
I am a big fan of Pinterest and here’s the link to my MS board. I have to read this board daily as it provides me with a mental boost and some inspiration to keep Fighting the Good Fight.
http://www.pinterest.com/CrusaderJenn/ms-battling-multiple-sclerosis/
crusaderjennblog 
